This Thursday Morning

Part I

I dug my fingers into the yolk of the sun and relished as it enveloped each eyelash

I curled deeper into the feathers of the swan as she sat upon the violinist’s bow and let each note cradle me in its arms 

The vibration running down my spine in tandem

I talked to god and I thanked the trees and I asked you what it means to be loved

By yourself

By another

By this life

I turned myself upside down before I could have a thought right side up and I wrote this poem in the shower 

Part II

I want to kiss this life on the lips 

And tumble into the arms of those that I love and 

Say thank you until my face turns blue and the flowers go home and the grass is covered in dew

And I want to remember this feeling in a year as I perch on the riverbank and thank the other side of feeling

I want to experience the dualities without digging my claws into them, as they are not mine to own 

And I want to relish in the change not as a loss but a growth and 

I am learning 

To appreciate without control

Without the need to stay exactly right here where I am

To experience without nostalgia creeping in where she is not yet due 

To be

In graciousness

For this wonderful life

Especially today 

When the world is dipped in gold and the loves of my life wait for me on the other side of the tarmac and I can feel the anticipation running through my mind like a child through a sprinkler and I want to wrap my arms around this warm hug of a feeling and never let it go 

And I remind myself to release

To lie head back in the waves and feel as I am now